The “Fast and Furious” Movies

fastFirst of all, it started as THE Fast and THE Furious, somewhere along the way, it morphed into Fast and Furious.  The movies became so bad that the word “the” didn’t want to be associated with them anymore.  They took the Alan Smithee route and removed their names from the picture.  The first Fast and Furious movie was ok.  It was formulaic and riddled with bad acting and obvious plot points, but the cars were cool and the action was good.  It was an action movie, and it had some young, hot action stars.  It was successful, and I wasn’t surprised when a second one was announced.

fast 22 Fast 2 Furious was released, with the same premise and the same idea as the first one.  But, there were more hot cars, hot actors and extreme action.  The plot was, again, formulaic and the acting was sparsely good.  People liked it because it was something familiar, something they had already seen….only repackaged using (trendy) numbers in the title instead of actual words.  The numbers were 2’s, denoting the film being the second in the series.  In all fairness, they should have stopped here.  This movie was bad, but not too bad and the action and racing sequences were pretty awesome.  This should have been it!

fast 3Taking note from sequels to 3 Ninjas, The Bad News Bears and The Karate Kid, the third Fast and Furious movie took place in Japan.  The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift was just bad.  The action sequences, once again, were ok….but not spectacular.  There’s only so much you can do to make a car race different from all the other car races in the other 2 movies.  This movie highlighted the idea of the “Tokyo drift,” a way of driving where you deliberately place the car into a skid.  This was the new premise of the movie, and it did not make for anything groundbreaking or exciting.  Universal studios was pushing it by making a third movie, and they knew it.  They tried to make it different from the others by setting it in Asia and making the cars hotter and more powerful, but it failed.  It flopped on its face.  Unfortunately, the mindless public that doesn’t like to think too hard ate it up, and the movie was successful in theaters and in rentals.  Also unfortunately, this led the studio to make more Fast and Furious films!

fast 4In all fairness to this horrible, horrible series of films, I stopped watching after number 3.  I have not seen the 4th, 5th, 6th or 7th one.  Thank goodness!  I’m assuming they were just as bad, if not worse, than number 3.  For number 4, the “the’s” were dropped.  The tagline for this one was “same cars, newer models.”  D=Basically denoting a return to the original premise of the first movie.  The actors were the same and the I’m sure the racing and action sequences were good.  I just couldn’t bring myself to watch another piece of this crap.  The formula was so over used and over done that I could not understand why they just kept churning out the same old claptrap and people flocked to see them.  Well, the flocks continued on this one (grossing over $300 million).  Perhaps everyone was on drugs, or they were paid to go see it, I don’t know…it’s so confusing!  Don’t people realize the movies are just the same one being rewritten over and over again!

fast 5Fast and Furious 5 was apparently more of a cop drama, with the 3 main stars (Paul Walker, Vin Diesel and Dwayne (the Rock) Johnson) playing up the police aspect from the first movie, this time in Rio de Janeiro.  The action was, apparently ok, but the acting was just as bad (if not worse) than before, yet more people shelled out their $10 for the matinee for this.  This is the highest grossing film of the franchise!  What the hell is going on?!?!  I can’t believe that the public can’t see the series for what it is….the same movie done over and over!

fast 6In 2013, Fast and Furious 6 was released, and the studio announced plans for a seventh.  Were they kidding?!?!  A seventh installment of a series of films that should have stopped after two?!?!  Are they nuts?  I saw a couple of clips from number 6 on Youtube while I was doing the research for this post, and, not only was the acting atrocious, the action scenes I watched were not up to the standard of the previous films (and that standard wasn’t that high).  Apparently, Universal decided to move the film out of the underground car racing scene for a more police-themed movie.  The audience was still there, however, and the film grossed more than 700 million dollars!  The action and racing scenes (just about the only redeeming factor about these films) were suffering, yet more people watched.  People love mindless stupidity, I guess….mindless people with money are who keep this franchise going!

fast 7Now we’re up to Fast and Furious 7, which I’m sure people will flock to because it’s the movie Paul Walker was making when he was killed in a car accident.  He is in the film for a short time (some scenes shot with his real-life brothers as stand-ins), but Universal had to woo some other young and hot action stars to chunk up the hunk quotient in the movie without him and, hopefully for the studio, get some new blood in that can continue the franchise.

Why not let the franchise die with Walker?  It would be a great homage to him to stop the franchise with his last movie and end the insanity of producing the same movie over and over.  Paul Walker was a mediocre actor, but he will always be remembered for his role in the Fast and Furious films.  It would be great if Universal recognized the “face of Fast and Furious” by ending the franchise with his last movie.  They will also save the world from being further subjected to subpar acting, predictable plots and average action and racing sequences.  It’s time for these movies to die the death they should have had in 2003 after 2 Fast 2 Furious!  These movies are like the cockroaches of the film industry.  Just when you think they’re finished (even when the major star dies), they rise back up and live on….FOR 7 FILMS!!!  Who is still watching these, and why are they spending their hard-earned money on this crap!?!?  I’ll never understand it!



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