Have you ever had this phenomenon occur: you’re ready for a relaxing massage after a rough work week, it’s time for you to relax and enjoy the soothing kneading of your muscles, and the massage therapist can’t keep their mouth shut the whole time? Is it just me, or does it break the relaxation when they talk to you? I don’t mean the occasional “Is the pressure alright,” or “does it hurt when I massage here.” I’m talking about the full-on conversation, where you learn about their whole life in the 60 minutes they have you as a captive audience. I don’t need to hear about your daughter’s latest school project, or how your mother keeps her tomatoes fresh! I definitely don’t need to hear about other clients’ muscle problems and how they are “so similar” to mine. It’s even worse when they ask you a question and then you have to answer with your mouth all scrunched up in that hole so it sounds like you’re chewing the inside of your cheek! Just keep your mouth shut and let me relax. If you’re so desperate for conversation, then maybe you chose the wrong profession.
Now, I have to say this is much more a phenomenon with the female massage therapists. I prefer men. A lot of people look at me funny when I say I would rather have a male massage therapist, but they are stronger, they work the muscles better and they are QUIET! They just do the job and get you out! Wham, bam, thank you client! It actually came to a point where I stopped going to a massage place because they only hired female therapists, and every one of them was a chatterbox in the room. All I want is my new age music or whale call sounds and a quiet hour. Is that too much to ask? We have so many people talking at us in our lives that we deserve this!